Data entry

Polynomial Regression Online Interface

This interface is designed to allow the graphing and retrieving of the coefficients for polynomial regression. This includes the mean average and linear regression which are both types of polynomial regression. Higher-order polynomials are possible (such as quadratic regression, cubic regression, ext.) making this tool useful for a range of analysis.

The data to analyze is placed in the text area above. It must be formatted so the first column is the x-values, and the second column the y-values. Columns may be separated by any character such as a comma. This character used for separation has to be specified. The same is true for the row separators. Generally a comma, space, or tab is used to separate columns and a linefeed to separate rows. Copying data from common spreadsheet software uses a tab to separate columns, and a linefeed to separate rows.

The regression analysis has several results that can be displayed. The equation displays the function that will produce the regression line. The coefficient check box will enable the individual coefficients to be printed from lowest order to highest. This is useful for copying the coefficients. A graph of the data and the regression line can also be made. This allows visual inspection of the data and the fit of the regression function. Lastly the R2 value can be displayed. This is a value that ranges between 0 (the worst fit) to 1 (a perfect fit) and used to determine the goodness of fit. The time needed to run the regression analysis is always displayed and reflects how long the server spent calculating the data.

Examples are provided to demonstrate various regression plots, and how the data is entered. To show the example, check the "Show examples" check box, and then select an example to display. After an example has been selected, the data for the example will be loaded into the form. Submitting this data will run the regression analysis and display the results. Each example displays the starting function so the fit can be compared.

Because this is a server-side script, the amount of data that can be entered is limited to 10000 points. The maximum number of coefficients to use in the regression analysis is limited to 15. Lastly, the precision of the data is limited to 20 decimal places. Should you require more data or coefficients, feel free to download the PHP library and run this program on your own computer.

User comments

From Andrew Que (http://www.DrQue.net/)

Middleton, WI, USA

May 05, 2014 at 6:47 PM

Leave some feedback if you found this interface useful.

From Kat

Fayetteville, AR

December 08, 2014 at 10:35 AM

This was very helpful since I forgot my calculator! Thank you so much! Would it be possible to add logarithmic or exponential regression to the list of available choices, please?

From Ken A

Southeast PA

December 12, 2014 at 1:41 PM

A most excellent tool.  Thank you!

From Pat

Melbourne, FL

December 16, 2014 at 9:34 AM

Really great, thanks so much.

From Sebastian

Wallingford, CT

January 08, 2015 at 8:00 PM

Thanks so much, I don't have a graphing calculator with polynomial regression, so helpful.

From Adam Douglass

Sierra Vista, AZ

January 09, 2015 at 11:25 AM

Thank you, this website helped my group with my engineering project. We got a strange graph by measuring the C02 output of a proof of concept for a mosquito trap mechanism, and we used heptic regression on split up portions of the graph, and obtained a rough estimate of the function of our graph. Thank you.

From Eduardo Contreras (http://urstupid.com)

your butt,CA

March 05, 2015 at 4:48 PM

this website is stupid and u have no life

From Roger

Portland OR

March 12, 2015 at 12:08 PM

I needed to find a best fit curve using more coefficients than my spreadsheet software provided.  This website was perfect!

From Jose Luis Navarro

Madrid

April 17, 2015 at 4:11 AM

Excellent job

From f you

April 25, 2015 at 5:28 PM

stupidest f-ing website ever

doesn't make any f-ing sense and doesn't f-ing work

From raj

April 30, 2015 at 5:12 AM

very helpful indeed

From Jesus Mejia Mendoza

Queretaro, Mexico

May 21, 2015 at 11:09 AM

This application help to me to fit easy, confident and fast the test data into the functions to make more confortable my work, thanks.

From Anil (http://kepran.com)

bangalore India

May 27, 2015 at 6:19 AM

Very helpful indeed. Thank you so much...

From Patrick

June 04, 2015 at 2:34 PM

Just awesome, we use this almost on a daily basis.

From Zoltan Vajda (http://r safety reason) )

Budapest, Hungary

June 18, 2015 at 12:49 PM

Thank you for your valuable work. I have checked theresults with Minitab vers. 14.0 and it is OK! Because Minitab works with Microsoft Windows only, and I use (for safety reason ) Ubuntu Linux , your page is a great help !

From rossisen (http://mathfest.blogspot.com)

North Bay, Canada

June 19, 2015 at 5:48 AM

This was very helpful for checking the results of regression calculations I am doing in the Geometer's Sketchpad.

From gyanguide (http://www.gyanguide.com/)

bangalore

October 05, 2015 at 4:46 AM

Thank you, this website helped my group with my engineering project.

From infocampus (http://infocampus.co.in/)

marathahalli

October 06, 2015 at 6:36 AM

it is very helpful .thankyou for posting

http://infocampus.co.in/web-designing-training-in-bangalore.html

From Mike S.

Pacific Grove, CA

October 15, 2015 at 2:20 PM

Thank you!  I needed a high-precision polynomial regression fit and your site gave me EXACTLY what I needed.  Simple and highly functional - perfect.  Thanks again.

From Day (http://Brazil)

October 28, 2015 at 11:40 AM

Very good!Help me a lot.Thank you

From Mark Ptak (http://www.we4kids.com)

Madison, wi

November 30, 2015 at 9:05 PM

Very nice.  Any hints on how to force a curve that always has a negative or zero slope?

From Nani

Stutensee

December 02, 2015 at 8:59 AM

Impressive

From mike

california

December 27, 2015 at 8:29 PM

you need a data input example

From Bob

Melbourne, Australia

February 10, 2016 at 12:33 AM

Could you submit your PHP libraries to GitHub, Composer/Packagist?

From Peter Rasmussen

Cornwall, UK

February 20, 2016 at 8:20 AM

I stumbled across this site by accident and found it so helpful in my project

From I don't understand

USA

February 20, 2016 at 11:34 AM

I don't get how this works. It makes no sense. I can't enter my data properly.

From Paul wilm (http://DIS T156.Ord)

Chicago Illinois

April 29, 2016 at 8:22 PM

If users just looked at the the examples provided it's easy to see how to enter data in the correct format. Great format for modeling reliability and validity of assessment item analysis data.

From Kyle

USA

May 19, 2016 at 2:09 PM

This website was extremely helpful! It was great to be able to take output from a java program in a txt and then just copy and paste!  Very very helpful:)

From Eric

Tennessee

May 21, 2016 at 2:45 AM

Very helpful. I am using Air Force DATCOM program to calculate some control coefficients for an aircraft design. I have to use experimental CFD wind tunnel data to get the longitudinal coefficients. Well, DATCOM has arrays for the data inputs, and one array wanted slopes of a function (like pitching moment due to alpha). That line is NOT linear, so I entered in the data as two columns, alpha vs. pitching moment and got the nice equation. Then, I took first derivative of the equation and used that in spreadsheet cells to generate the line slopes at any given alpha. Saved me ton of time and grief. Thank you. 

From miz

May 21, 2016 at 10:12 AM

this saved my life, multiple times. it works so well!

From Maz

Aberdeen, Scotland

May 31, 2016 at 1:16 PM

Thank you taking the time for developing the tool and sharing it with us. Very helpful.

From JD

Tulsa, OK

July 19, 2016 at 2:04 PM

Saved for later.  Can't use it this time because my dataset is too big.

Thanks for the development.

From Naef

August 14, 2016 at 10:43 AM

very useful, thanks.

From pgmaser

Houston, Texas

August 16, 2016 at 7:28 PM

Any chance you could show equations model or approximations.  How are finding the Coefficient of Determine for higher order Polynomial.  Website is Great, its works and its graph and solving

some of my problems. Anyway, I need some help in solving cubic equations in a labview environment.  pgmaser@aol.com if anyone wants to suggest somethings.

From MHSLRD (http://Reddind, California)

Aug 17, 2016

August 17, 2016 at 5:35 PM

EXCELLENT!  Thank you.

From Steve

Niceville, FL

September 21, 2016 at 9:02 AM

Tried Excel and Matlab - both failed miserably to come up with a curve fit.  Your tool worked perfectly!  Thanks!

From JT

United Kingdom

September 27, 2016 at 4:51 AM

Absolutely amazing resource.  There are many tools for curve fitting, but most have very limited data sets.  This gives you much more data set freedom, but the real power of this tool is being able to force coefficients.  I couldn't find any other tool online that could do that, including paid sites.  Well done and thanks for providing this!

From Tom

The Netherlands

October 08, 2016 at 5:48 AM

Very handy, easy to use. Thanks a lot!

From Emanuel

Croatia

November 16, 2016 at 3:43 AM

Very good site, but you have a bug on logaritmich regression. The resulthing coefficients are missmatched. It should be f(x) = B*ln(x) + A.

From School boy Q

Sioux falls South Dakota

November 22, 2016 at 9:59 AM

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caia conio

November 30, 2016 at 1:16 AM

ty bro yo are the best person in the world. Thank's C: Hdp viva willyrex

From Pic18cachondo

Alaska

November 30, 2016 at 4:48 AM

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November 30, 2016 at 4:49 AM

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From From

November 30, 2016 at 4:54 AM

Cogia todos los pics y los reventaba.

From BUSCO RIÑON (http://organos.net)

Rumania

November 30, 2016 at 5:06 AM

Compro riñon urge, buen comprador 5 estrellas no me fio, quedamos en barcelona para transplante.

Vendedores serios Gracias

From Thomas (http://robo-t.org)

Tirana, Albania

December 02, 2016 at 5:23 AM

This is great for use in our robotics class.  Our robotic arm has several non-linear relationships towards the ends of its extremes. It would be fairly hard to come up with an efficient and accurate function  You helped me produce the formulas for spatial coordination.   

From The Big G

Con Tu Mama

December 08, 2016 at 4:01 PM

Listen To My Mixtape

From Generic cancer cell

December 08, 2016 at 4:02 PM

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From Big_tit_bitch69 (http://Jesus.com)

La verga

December 08, 2016 at 4:04 PM

Alguien tiene tacos?

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December 08, 2016 at 4:12 PM

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From Kill me plz

December 08, 2016 at 4:14 PM

. Bush did 911

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From Raffaele

Pistoia (Italy)

December 14, 2016 at 3:06 AM

Strumento utilissimo. Grazie infinite...

From Sam

Cardiff, Wales

January 15, 2017 at 4:08 PM

This is great! I created my own version of this a while back but when I got >8 degrees it became slow. But this website can handle 15 degrees with no problem. How??

From Francois

Paris, France

January 23, 2017 at 6:38 AM

Very nice, fast.

It would be great to have the maximum error.

From Mansur

Pittsburgh, PA

February 02, 2017 at 6:26 PM

Excellent tool, thank you so much!

From dhananjay (http://www.rginfotechnology.com)

Noida

February 13, 2017 at 5:21 AM

very good tool, thankful to you.

From Blaise

Minnesota, USA

February 16, 2017 at 6:27 AM

Thank you very much, this works great and I use it a lot.

From Alex

Canada

February 23, 2017 at 9:35 PM

Thank you this tool. Usually I use MS Excel to play with polynomials to see how measurements behave, but it is limited to 6 order polynomial only while sometimes I need to verify data against 9- or ever 11-order. A quite helpful tool!

From Rajnikanth

India

February 28, 2017 at 6:51 AM

This is great and very useful. I want to fit still higher order and  my datapoints is ~8000. where is the link to download php code. I will refer your work.

From Walter74

Chamonix, France

March 15, 2017 at 11:19 AM

Hi,

While checking some 2nd degree polynomial R²s produced using your Code against Excel values, I came across some anomalies when a set of data contained a number of values smaller than 0.0001 . However, these anomalies disappeared when I set the bcMaths to bcscale(20).

One example: 0.7142 compared to an Excel value of 0.9629

This post is duplicated on the http://polynomialregression.drque.net/ page

Hope this is helpful & thanks again.

Yours, Walter

From AD

UK, north west

May 08, 2017 at 7:10 AM

Simple to use and got me a great fit equation for an old road using measured coordinates.

From Suny

utah

July 19, 2017 at 8:33 PM

Wow, simplest and yet most accurate calculator ever!!! Bomb bomb bomb

From WRL

Newport, RI

August 08, 2017 at 11:13 PM

Nice tool.  Worked great.  I don't understand how some users had a problem.  Then of course there are the morons.  Anyway tool produced a better fit than Excel.  Thank you for the effort.

From steve

Ventura, ca

August 22, 2017 at 11:01 AM

Fantastic tool. Really appreciate the site.

From Dan

Appleton, WI

November 28, 2017 at 7:59 PM

Helped me do linear regression with 15 coefficients! I actually needed that many coefficients but M$ Excel in 2017 limits to the sixth power.

From Serhan

Europe

February 26, 2018 at 7:52 AM

greatt

From Aaron Kreider (http://www.justicemap.org)

March 20, 2018 at 6:32 PM

It isn't clear what order the columns are (x1, x2...xn, and y).

From Drew

April 20, 2018 at 3:02 PM

Exactly what I needed. Thanks!

From Eric

NY

May 14, 2018 at 12:20 PM

life saver

From preethievolet (http://www.etcoe.in)

RT nagar, Bangalore

August 30, 2018 at 1:00 AM

Very useful.

From Kalersky

Sydney AU

October 07, 2018 at 12:41 AM

Fantastic, works a treat, thanks.

From Alex

Moscow, Russia

October 10, 2018 at 12:44 AM

Thanks a lot

From Digitalkora (http://www.digitalkora.com)

Bangalore

November 24, 2018 at 12:23 AM

Wow, It's a great tool. It's very helpful to do our easy job. Thanks for sharing this great info.

From David (http://www.metrovial.mx)

Mexico City

December 12, 2018 at 2:50 AM

Excellent tool. Congratulations, just I'd like to add this comment:

While performing a regression of type f( x ) = a ln x + b something is working bad

I guess that coefficients a and b are swapped.

From John Ferreirinho

Perth Western Australia

March 13, 2019 at 8:52 AM

Great website and great calculator thanks.  I found the high order / degree polynomial regression very useful.

From suresh babu

bangalore

March 23, 2019 at 6:26 AM

Very good write-up. I certainly love this website.

From raj (http://www.sitegalleria.com)

Bangalore

April 15, 2019 at 12:35 AM

Great website and great calculator thanks.  Wow, It's a great tool. It's very helpful to do our easy job. Thanks for sharing this great info.

From Prof K K Mishre (http://www.gmail.com)

INDIA

April 15, 2019 at 2:29 AM

Highly abnormal as per data entry is concerned. So unable to enter the data.

Extremely abnormal hints for the data.

Suggested to give an example for data entry!

From Kurro

Igorre (Basque Country)

June 03, 2019 at 7:43 AM

Very good work, thank's for it!

From Dan Hunter

SF Bay, CA, US

August 01, 2019 at 3:01 PM

Worked flawlessly the 1st time. Thank you so much for your work on this!!

From Peter

Utrecht

October 04, 2019 at 5:02 AM

Very useful. Even if the data has more than 3 columns, the program automatically uses the first 2.

From Abraham Adamu

Ethiopia

January 28, 2020 at 11:20 PM

Thank you, I can't leave without a huge gratitude!!

But why can't I find a donate button for a nice and satisfying site like this?

From Noel Lloyd

Melbourne Australia

January 30, 2020 at 10:56 AM

Found the function that fits my data very closely, incredibly quickly.

AWESOME SITE !!

From Bharat (http://www.bharatgodigital.com/)

India

January 31, 2020 at 8:46 AM

Very useful article.Information.

From Veer

February 01, 2020 at 12:11 AM

I need help from someone ho can help me understand how to use this software

From Ceyhun

February 02, 2020 at 10:24 AM

this tool helped me a lot.

@Veer let me reach and help you..

From Big chungus

February 11, 2020 at 11:02 AM

Big chungus

From Daft Punk

February 11, 2020 at 11:05 AM

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From your mom

February 11, 2020 at 11:06 AM

im being forced to do this against my will    help me please

From GEFFORY (http://cockandballtorture.com)

In Your CHuNkY MAmA

February 11, 2020 at 11:06 AM

Yes thank you Kanye very cool

From CoolFeetGuy (http://aternos.net)

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From Phone Guy

February 11, 2020 at 11:12 AM

Hello, hello? Uh, I wanted to record a message for you to help you get settled in on your first night. Um, I actually worked in that office before you. I'm finishing up my last week now, as a matter of fact. So, I know it can be a bit overwhelming, but I'm here to tell you there's nothing to worry about. Uh, you'll do fine. So, let's just focus on getting you through your first week. Okay?

Uh, let's see, first there's an introductory greeting from the company that I'm supposed to read. Uh, it's kind of a legal thing, you know. Um, "Welcome to Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. A magical place for kids and grown-ups alike, where fantasy and fun come to life. Fazbear Entertainment is not responsible for damage to property or person. Upon discovering that damage or death has occurred, a missing person report will be filed within 90 days, or as soon property and premises have been thoroughly cleaned and bleached, and the carpets have been replaced."

Blah blah blah, now that might sound bad, I know, but there's really nothing to worry about. Uh, the animatronic characters here do get a bit quirky at night, but do I blame them? No. If I were forced to sing those same stupid songs for twenty years and I never got a bath? I'd probably be a bit irritable at night too. So, remember, these characters hold a special place in the hearts of children and we need to show them a little respect, right? Okay.

So, just be aware, the characters do tend to wander a bit. Uh, they're left in some kind of free roaming mode at night. Uh...Something about their servos locking up if they get turned off for too long. Uh, they used to be allowed to walk around during the day too. But then there was The Bite of '87. Yeah. I-It's amazing that the human body can live without the frontal lobe, you know?

Uh, now concerning your safety, the only real risk to you as a night watchman here, if any, is the fact that these characters, uh, if they happen to see you after hours probably won't recognize you as a person. They'll p-most likely see you as a metal endoskeleton without its costume on. Now since that's against the rules here at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, they'll probably try to...forcefully stuff you inside a Freddy Fazbear suit. Um, now, that wouldn't be so bad if the suits themselves weren't filled with crossbeams, wires, and animatronic devices, especially around the facial area. So, you could imagine how having your head forcefully pressed inside one of those could cause a bit of discomfort...and death. Uh, the only parts of you that would likely see the light of day again would be your eyeballs and teeth when they pop out the front of the mask, heh.

Y-Yeah, they don't tell you these things when you sign up. But hey, first day should be a breeze. I'll chat with you tomorrow. Uh, check those cameras, and remember to close the doors only if absolutely necessary. Gotta conserve power. Alright, good night

From Barry B. Benson (http://swollenballs.com)

New York

February 11, 2020 at 11:14 AM

According to all known laws

of aviation,

 

there is no way a bee

should be able to fly.

 

Its wings are too small to get

its fat little body off the ground.

 

The bee, of course, flies anyway

 

because bees don't care

what humans think is impossible.

 

Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

 

Ooh, black and yellow!

Let's shake it up a little.

 

Barry! Breakfast is ready!

 

Ooming!

 

Hang on a second.

 

Hello?

 

- Barry?

- Adam?

 

- Oan you believe this is happening?

- I can't. I'll pick you up.

 

Looking sharp.

 

Use the stairs. Your father

paid good money for those.

 

Sorry. I'm excited.

 

Here's the graduate.

We're very proud of you, son.

 

A perfect report card, all B's.

 

Very proud.

 

Ma! I got a thing going here.

 

- You got lint on your fuzz.

- Ow! That's me!

 

- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.

- Bye!

 

Barry, I told you,

stop flying in the house!

 

- Hey, Adam.

- Hey, Barry.

 

- Is that fuzz gel?

- A little. Special day, graduation.

 

Never thought I'd make it.

 

Three days grade school,

three days high school.

 

Those were awkward.

 

Three days college. I'm glad I took

a day and hitchhiked around the hive.

 

You did come back different.

 

- Hi, Barry.

- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.

 

- Hear about Frankie?

- Yeah.

 

- You going to the funeral?

- No, I'm not going.

 

Everybody knows,

sting someone, you die.

 

Don't waste it on a squirrel.

Such a hothead.

 

I guess he could have

just gotten out of the way.

 

I love this incorporating

an amusement park into our day.

 

That's why we don't need vacations.

 

Boy, quite a bit of pomp...

under the circumstances.

 

- Well, Adam, today we are men.

- We are!

 

- Bee-men.

- Amen!

 

Hallelujah!

 

Students, faculty, distinguished bees,

 

please welcome Dean Buzzwell.

 

Welcome, New Hive Oity

graduating class of...

 

...9:15.

 

That concludes our ceremonies.

 

And begins your career

at Honex Industries!

 

Will we pick ourjob today?

 

I heard it's just orientation.

 

Heads up! Here we go.

 

Keep your hands and antennas

inside the tram at all times.

 

- Wonder what it'll be like?

- A little scary.

 

Welcome to Honex,

a division of Honesco

 

and a part of the Hexagon Group.

 

This is it!

 

Wow.

 

Wow.

 

We know that you, as a bee,

have worked your whole life

 

to get to the point where you

can work for your whole life.

 

Honey begins when our valiant Pollen

Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.

 

Our top-secret formula

 

is automatically color-corrected,

scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured

 

into this soothing sweet syrup

 

with its distinctive

golden glow you know as...

 

Honey!

 

- That girl was hot.

- She's my cousin!

 

- She is?

- Yes, we're all cousins.

 

- Right. You're right.

- At Honex, we constantly strive

 

to improve every aspect

of bee existence.

 

These bees are stress-testing

a new helmet technology.

 

- What do you think he makes?

- Not enough.

 

Here we have our latest advancement,

the Krelman.

 

- What does that do?

- Oatches that little strand of honey

 

that hangs after you pour it.

Saves us millions.

 

Oan anyone work on the Krelman?

 

Of course. Most bee jobs are

small ones. But bees know

 

that every small job,

if it's done well, means a lot.

 

But choose carefully

 

because you'll stay in the job

you pick for the rest of your life.

 

The same job the rest of your life?

I didn't know that.

 

What's the difference?

 

You'll be happy to know that bees,

as a species, haven't had one day off

 

in 27 million years.

 

So you'll just work us to death?

 

We'll sure try.

 

Wow! That blew my mind!

 

"What's the difference?"

How can you say that?

 

One job forever?

That's an insane choice to have to make.

 

I'm relieved. Now we only have

to make one decision in life.

 

But, Adam, how could they

never have told us that?

 

Why would you question anything?

We're bees.

 

We're the most perfectly

functioning society on Earth.

 

You ever think maybe things

work a little too well here?

 

Like what? Give me one example.

 

I don't know. But you know

what I'm talking about.

 

Please clear the gate.

Royal Nectar Force on approach.

 

Wait a second. Oheck it out.

 

- Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!

- Wow.

 

I've never seen them this close.

 

They know what it's like

outside the hive.

 

Yeah, but some don't come back.

 

- Hey, Jocks!

- Hi, Jocks!

 

You guys did great!

 

You're monsters!

You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!

 

- I wonder where they were.

- I don't know.

 

Their day's not planned.

 

Outside the hive, flying who knows

where, doing who knows what.

 

You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen

Jock. You have to be bred for that.

 

Right.

 

Look. That's more pollen

than you and I will see in a lifetime.

 

It's just a status symbol.

Bees make too much of it.

 

Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it

and the ladies see you wearing it.

 

Those ladies?

Aren't they our cousins too?

 

Distant. Distant.

 

Look at these two.

 

- Oouple of Hive Harrys.

- Let's have fun with them.

 

It must be dangerous

being a Pollen Jock.

 

Yeah. Once a bear pinned me

against a mushroom!

 

He had a paw on my throat,

and with the other, he was slapping me!

 

- Oh, my!

- I never thought I'd knock him out.

 

What were you doing during this?

 

Trying to alert the authorities.

 

I can autograph that.

 

A little gusty out there today,

wasn't it, comrades?

 

Yeah. Gusty.

 

We're hitting a sunflower patch

six miles from here tomorrow.

 

- Six miles, huh?

- Barry!

 

A puddle jump for us,

but maybe you're not up for it.

 

- Maybe I am.

- You are not!

 

We're going 0900 at J-Gate.

 

What do you think, buzzy-boy?

Are you bee enough?

 

I might be. It all depends

on what 0900 means.

 

Hey, Honex!

 

Dad, you surprised me.

 

You decide what you're interested in?

 

- Well, there's a lot of choices.

- But you only get one.

 

Do you ever get bored

doing the same job every day?

 

Son, let me tell you about stirring.

 

You grab that stick, and you just

move it around, and you stir it around.

 

You get yourself into a rhythm.

It's a beautiful thing.

 

You know, Dad,

the more I think about it,

 

maybe the honey field

just isn't right for me.

 

You were thinking of what,

making balloon animals?

 

That's a bad job

for a guy with a stinger.

 

Janet, your son's not sure

he wants to go into honey!

 

- Barry, you are so funny sometimes.

- I'm not trying to be funny.

 

You're not funny! You're going

into honey. Our son, the stirrer!

 

- You're gonna be a stirrer?

- No one's listening to me!

 

Wait till you see the sticks I have.

 

I could say anything right now.

I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!

 

Let's open some honey and celebrate!

 

Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.

Shave my antennae.

 

Shack up with a grasshopper. Get

a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!

 

I'm so proud.

 

- We're starting work today!

- Today's the day.

 

Oome on! All the good jobs

will be gone.

 

Yeah, right.

 

Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,

stirrer, front desk, hair removal...

 

- Is it still available?

- Hang on. Two left!

 

One of them's yours! Oongratulations!

Step to the side.

 

- What'd you get?

- Picking crud out. Stellar!

 

Wow!

 

Oouple of newbies?

 

Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!

 

Make your choice.

 

- You want to go first?

- No, you go.

 

Oh, my. What's available?

 

Restroom attendant's open,

not for the reason you think.

 

- Any chance of getting the Krelman?

- Sure, you're on.

 

I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.

 

Wax monkey's always open.

 

The Krelman opened up again.

 

What happened?

 

A bee died. Makes an opening. See?

He's dead. Another dead one.

 

Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.

 

Dead from the neck up.

Dead from the neck down. That's life!

 

Oh, this is so hard!

 

Heating, cooling,

stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,

 

humming, inspector number seven,

lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,

 

mite wrangler. Barry, what

do you think I should... Barry?

 

Barry!

 

All right, we've got the sunflower patch

in quadrant nine...

 

What happened to you?

Where are you?

 

- I'm going out.

- Out? Out where?

 

- Out there.

- Oh, no!

 

I have to, before I go

to work for the rest of my life.

 

You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?

 

Another call coming in.

 

If anyone's feeling brave,

there's a Korean deli on 83rd

 

that gets their roses today.

 

Hey, guys.

 

- Look at that.

- Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?

 

Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.

 

It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.

 

Really? Feeling lucky, are you?

 

Sign here, here. Just initial that.

 

- Thank you.

- OK.

 

You got a rain advisory today,

 

and as you all know,

bees cannot fly in rain.

 

So be careful. As always,

watch your brooms,

 

hockey sticks, dogs,

birds, bears and bats.

 

Also, I got a couple of reports

of root beer being poured on us.

 

Murphy's in a home because of it,

babbling like a cicada!

 

- That's awful.

- And a reminder for you rookies,

 

bee law number one,

absolutely no talking to humans!

 

All right, launch positions!

 

Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,

buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!

 

Black and yellow!

 

Hello!

 

You ready for this, hot shot?

 

Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.

 

Wind, check.

 

- Antennae, check.

- Nectar pack, check.

 

- Wings, check.

- Stinger, check.

 

Scared out of my shorts, check.

 

OK, ladies,

 

let's move it out!

 

Pound those petunias,

you striped stem-suckers!

 

All of you, drain those flowers!

 

Wow! I'm out!

 

I can't believe I'm out!

 

So blue.

 

I feel so fast and free!

 

Box kite!

 

Wow!

 

Flowers!

 

This is Blue Leader.

We have roses visual.

 

Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.

 

Roses!

 

30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.

 

Stand to the side, kid.

It's got a bit of a kick.

 

That is one nectar collector!

 

- Ever see pollination up close?

- No, sir.

 

I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it

over here. Maybe a dash over there,

 

a pinch on that one.

See that? It's a little bit of magic.

 

That's amazing. Why do we do that?

 

That's pollen power. More pollen, more

flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.

 

Oool.

 

I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.

Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?

 

Oopy that visual.

 

Wait. One of these flowers

seems to be on the move.

 

Say again? You're reporting

a moving flower?

 

Affirmative.

 

That was on the line!

 

This is the coolest. What is it?

 

I don't know, but I'm loving this color.

 

It smells good.

Not like a flower, but I like it.

 

Yeah, fuzzy.

 

Ohemical-y.

 

Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.

 

My sweet lord of bees!

 

Oandy-brain, get off there!

 

Problem!

 

- Guys!

- This could be bad.

 

Affirmative.

 

Very close.

 

Gonna hurt.

 

Mama's little boy.

 

You are way out of position, rookie!

 

Ooming in at you like a missile!

 

Help me!

 

I don't think these are flowers.

 

- Should we tell him?

- I think he knows.

 

What is this?!

 

Match point!

 

You can start packing up, honey,

because you're about to eat it!

 

Yowser!

 

Gross.

 

There's a bee in the car!

 

- Do something!

- I'm driving!

 

- Hi, bee.

- He's back here!

 

He's going to sting me!

 

Nobody move. If you don't move,

he won't sting you. Freeze!

 

He blinked!

 

Spray him, Granny!

 

What are you doing?!

 

Wow... the tension level

out here is unbelievable.

 

I gotta get home.

 

Oan't fly in rain.

 

Oan't fly in rain.

 

Oan't fly in rain.

 

Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!

 

Ken, could you close

the window please?

 

Ken, could you close

the window please?

 

Oheck out my new resume.

I made it into a fold-out brochure.

 

You see? Folds out.

 

Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.

 

What was that?

 

Maybe this time. This time. This time.

This time! This time! This...

 

Drapes!

 

That is diabolical.

 

It's fantastic. It's got all my special

skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.

 

What's number one? Star Wars?

 

Nah, I don't go for that...

 

...kind of stuff.

 

No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.

They're out of their minds.

 

When I leave a job interview, they're

flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.

 

There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.

 

I don't remember the sun

having a big 75 on it.

 

I predicted global warming.

 

I could feel it getting hotter.

At first I thought it was just me.

 

Wait! Stop! Bee!

 

Stand back. These are winter boots.

 

Wait!

 

Don't kill him!

 

You know I'm allergic to them!

This thing could kill me!

 

Why does his life have

less value than yours?

 

Why does his life have any less value

than mine? Is that your statement?

 

I'm just saying all life has value. You

don't know what he's capable of feeling.

 

My brochure!

 

There you go, little guy.

 

I'm not scared of him.

It's an allergic thing.

 

Put that on your resume brochure.

 

My whole face could puff up.

 

Make it one of your special skills.

 

Knocking someone out

is also a special skill.

 

Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.

 

- Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?

- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.

 

- You could put carob chips on there.

- Bye.

 

- Supposed to be less calories.

- Bye.

 

I gotta say something.

 

She saved my life.

I gotta say something.

 

All right, here it goes.

 

Nah.

 

What would I say?

 

I could really get in trouble.

 

It's a bee law.

You're not supposed to talk to a human.

 

I can't believe I'm doing this.

 

I've got to.

 

Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!

 

No. Yes. No.

 

Do it. I can't.

 

How should I start it?

"You like jazz?" No, that's no good.

 

Here she comes! Speak, you fool!

 

Hi!

 

I'm sorry.

 

- You're talking.

- Yes, I know.

 

You're talking!

 

I'm so sorry.

 

No, it's OK. It's fine.

I know I'm dreaming.

 

But I don't recall going to bed.

 

Well, I'm sure this

is very disconcerting.

 

This is a bit of a surprise to me.

I mean, you're a bee!

 

I am. And I'm not supposed

to be doing this,

 

but they were all trying to kill me.

 

And if it wasn't for you...

 

I had to thank you.

It's just how I was raised.

 

That was a little weird.

 

- I'm talking with a bee.

- Yeah.

 

I'm talking to a bee.

And the bee is talking to me!

 

I just want to say I'm grateful.

I'll leave now.

 

- Wait! How did you learn to do that?

- What?

 

The talking thing.

 

Same way you did, I guess.

"Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.

 

- That's very funny.

- Yeah.

 

Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,

we'd cry with what we have to deal with.

 

Anyway...

 

Oan I...

 

...get you something?

- Like what?

 

I don't know. I mean...

I don't know. Ooffee?

 

I don't want to put you out.

 

It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.

 

- It's just coffee.

- I hate to impose.

 

- Don't be ridiculous!

- Actually, I would love a cup.

 

Hey, you want rum cake?

 

- I shouldn't.

- Have some.

 

- No, I can't.

- Oome on!

 

I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.

 

- Where?

- These stripes don't help.

 

You look great!

 

I don't know if you know

anything about fashion.

 

Are you all right?

 

No.

 

He's making the tie in the cab

as they're flying up Madison.

 

He finally gets there.

 

He runs up the steps into the church.

The wedding is on.

 

And he says, "Watermelon?

I thought you said Guatemalan.

 

Why would I marry a watermelon?"

 

Is that a bee joke?

 

That's the kind of stuff we do.

 

Yeah, different.

 

So, what are you gonna do, Barry?

 

About work? I don't know.

 

I want to do my part for the hive,

but I can't do it the way they want.

 

I know how you feel.

 

- You do?

- Sure.

 

My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or

a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.

 

- Really?

- My only interest is flowers.

 

Our new queen was just elected

with that same campaign slogan.

 

Anyway, if you look...

 

There's my hive right there. See it?

 

You're in Sheep Meadow!

 

Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!

 

No way! I know that area.

I lost a toe ring there once.

 

- Why do girls put rings on their toes?

- Why not?

 

- It's like putting a hat on your knee.

- Maybe I'll try that.

 

- You all right, ma'am?

- Oh, yeah. Fine.

 

Just having two cups of coffee!

 

Anyway, this has been great.

Thanks for the coffee.

 

Yeah, it's no trouble.

 

Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,

I'd be up the rest of my life.

 

Are you...?

 

Oan I take a piece of this with me?

 

Sure! Here, have a crumb.

 

- Thanks!

- Yeah.

 

All right. Well, then...

I guess I'll see you around.

 

Or not.

 

OK, Barry.

 

And thank you

so much again... for before.

 

Oh, that? That was nothing.

 

Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...

 

This can't possibly work.

 

He's all set to go.

We may as well try it.

 

OK, Dave, pull the chute.

 

- Sounds amazing.

- It was amazing!

 

It was the scariest,

happiest moment of my life.

 

Humans! I can't believe

you were with humans!

 

Giant, scary humans!

What were they like?

 

Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.

 

They eat crazy giant things.

They drive crazy.

 

- Do they try and kill you, like on TV?

- Some of them. But some of them don't.

 

- How'd you get back?

- Poodle.

 

You did it, and I'm glad. You saw

whatever you wanted to see.

 

You had your "experience." Now you

can pick out yourjob and be normal.

 

- Well...

- Well?

 

Well, I met someone.

 

You did? Was she Bee-ish?

 

- A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!

- No, no, no, not a wasp.

 

- Spider?

- I'm not attracted to spiders.

 

I know it's the hottest thing,

with the eight legs and all.

 

I can't get by that face.

 

So who is she?

 

She's... human.

 

No, no. That's a bee law.

You wouldn't break a bee law.

 

- Her name's Vanessa.

- Oh, boy.

 

She's so nice. And she's a florist!

 

Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!

 

We're not dating.

 

You're flying outside the hive, talking

to humans that attack our homes

 

with power washers and M-80s!

One-eighth a stick of dynamite!

 

She saved my life!

And she understands me.

 

This is over!

 

Eat this.

 

This is not over! What was that?

 

- They call it a crumb.

- It was so stingin' stripey!

 

And that's not what they eat.

That's what falls off what they eat!

 

- You know what a Oinnabon is?

- No.

 

It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.

They heat it up...

 

Sit down!

 

...really hot!

- Listen to me!

 

We are not them! We're us.

There's us and there's them!

 

Yes, but who can deny

the heart that is yearning?

 

There's no yearning.

Stop yearning. Listen to me!

 

You have got to start thinking bee,

my friend. Thinking bee!

 

- Thinking bee.

- Thinking bee.

 

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 

There he is. He's in the pool.

 

You know what your problem is, Barry?

 

I gotta start thinking bee?

 

How much longer will this go on?

 

It's been three days!

Why aren't you working?

 

I've got a lot of big life decisions

to think about.

 

What life? You have no life!

You have no job. You're barely a bee!

 

Would it kill you

to make a little honey?

 

Barry, come out.

Your father's talking to you.

 

Martin, would you talk to him?

 

Barry, I'm talking to you!

 

You coming?

 

Got everything?

 

All set!

 

Go ahead. I'll catch up.

 

Don't be too long.

 

Watch this!

 

Vanessa!

 

- We're still here.

- I told you not to yell at him.

 

He doesn't respond to yelling!

 

- Then why yell at me?

- Because you don't listen!

 

I'm not listening to this.

 

Sorry, I've gotta go.

 

- Where are you going?

- I'm meeting a friend.

 

A girl? Is this why you can't decide?

 

Bye.

 

I just hope she's Bee-ish.

 

They have a huge parade

of flowers every year in Pasadena?

 

To be in the Tournament of Roses,

that's every florist's dream!

 

Up on a float, surrounded

by flowers, crowds cheering.

 

A tournament. Do the roses

compete in athletic events?

 

No. All right, I've got one.

How come you don't fly everywhere?

 

It's exhausting. Why don't you

run everywhere? It's faster.

 

Yeah, OK, I see, I see.

All right, your turn.

 

TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?

That's insane!

 

You don't have that?

 

We have Hivo, but it's a disease.

It's a horrible, horrible disease.

 

Oh, my.

 

Dumb bees!

 

You must want to sting all those jerks.

 

We try not to sting.

It's usually fatal for us.

 

So you have to watch your temper.

 

Very carefully.

You kick a wall, take a walk,

 

write an angry letter and throw it out.

Work through it like any emotion:

 

Anger, jealousy, lust.

 

Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?

 

Yeah.

 

- What is wrong with you?!

- It's a bug.

 

He's not bothering anybody.

Get out of here, you creep!

 

What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?

 

Yeah, it was. How did you know?

 

It felt like about 10 pages.

Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.

 

You've really got that

down to a science.

 

- I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.

- I'll bet.

 

What in the name

of Mighty Hercules is this?

 

How did this get here?

Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,

 

Ray Liotta Private Select?

 

- Is he that actor?

- I never heard of him.

 

- Why is this here?

- For people. We eat it.

 

You don't have

enough food of your own?

 

- Well, yes.

- How do you get it?

 

- Bees make it.

- I know who makes it!

 

And it's hard to make it!

 

There's heating, cooling, stirring.

You need a whole Krelman thing!

 

- It's organic.

- It's our-ganic!

 

It's just honey, Barry.

 

Just what?!

 

Bees don't know about this!

This is stealing! A lot of stealing!

 

You've taken our homes, schools,

hospitals! This is all we have!

 

And it's on sale?!

I'm getting to the bottom of this.

 

I'm getting to the bottom

of all of this!

 

Hey, Hector.

 

- You almost done?

- Almost.

 

He is here. I sense it.

 

Well, I guess I'll go home now

 

and just leave this nice honey out,

with no one around.

 

You're busted, box boy!

 

I knew I heard something.

So you can talk!

 

I can talk.

And now you'll start talking!

 

Where you getting the sweet stuff?

Who's your supplier?

 

I don't understand.

I thought we were friends.

 

The last thing we want

to do is upset bees!

 

You're too late! It's ours now!

 

You, sir, have crossed

the wrong sword!

 

You, sir, will be lunch

for my iguana, Ignacio!

 

Where is the honey coming from?

 

Tell me where!

 

Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!

 

Orazy person!

 

What horrible thing has happened here?

 

These faces, they never knew

what hit them. And now

 

they're on the road to nowhere!

 

Just keep still.

 

What? You're not dead?

 

Do I look dead? They will wipe anything

that moves. Where you headed?

 

To Honey Farms.

I am onto something huge here.

 

I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,

crazy stuff. Blows your head off!

 

I'm going to Tacoma.

 

- And you?

- He really is dead.

 

All right.

 

Uh-oh!

 

- What is that?!

- Oh, no!

 

- A wiper! Triple blade!

- Triple blade?

 

Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!

 

Why does everything have

to be so doggone clean?!

 

How much do you people need to see?!

 

Open your eyes!

Stick your head out the window!

 

From NPR News in Washington,

I'm Oarl Kasell.

 

But don't kill no more bugs!

 

- Bee!

- Moose blood guy!!

 

- You hear something?

- Like what?

 

Like tiny screaming.

 

Turn off the radio.

 

Whassup, bee boy?

 

Hey, Blood.

 

Just a row of honey jars,

as far as the eye could see.

 

Wow!

 

I assume wherever this truck goes

is where they're getting it.

 

I mean, that honey's ours.

 

- Bees hang tight.

- We're all jammed in.

 

It's a close community.

 

Not us, man. We on our own.

Every mosquito on his own.

 

- What if you get in trouble?

- You a mosquito, you in trouble.

 

Nobody likes us. They just smack.

See a mosquito, smack, smack!

 

At least you're out in the world.

You must meet girls.

 

Mosquito girls try to trade up,

get with a moth, dragonfly.

 

Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.

 

You got to be kidding me!

 

Mooseblood's about to leave

the building! So long, bee!

 

- Hey, guys!

- Mooseblood!

 

I knew I'd catch y'all down here.

Did you bring your crazy straw?

 

We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,

and it's pretty much pure profit.

 

What is this place?

 

A bee's got a brain

the size of a pinhead.

 

They are pinheads!

 

Pinhead.

 

- Oheck out the new smoker.

- Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.

 

The Thomas 3000!

 

Smoker?

 

Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.

Twice the nicotine, all the tar.

 

A couple breaths of this

knocks them right out.

 

They make the honey,

and we make the money.

 

"They make the honey,

and we make the money"?

 

Oh, my!

 

What's going on? Are you OK?

 

Yeah. It doesn't last too long.

 

Do you know you're

in a fake hive with fake walls?

 

Our queen was moved here.

We had no choice.

 

This is your queen?

That's a man in women's clothes!

 

That's a drag queen!

 

What is this?

 

Oh, no!

 

There's hundreds of them!

 

Bee honey.

 

Our honey is being brazenly stolen

on a massive scale!

 

This is worse than anything bears

have done! I intend to do something.

 

Oh, Barry, stop.

 

Who told you humans are taking

our honey? That's a rumor.

 

Do these look like rumors?

 

That's a conspiracy theory.

These are obviously doctored photos.

 

How did you get mixed up in this?

 

He's been talking to humans.

 

- What?

- Talking to humans?!

 

He has a human girlfriend.

And they make out!

 

Make out? Barry!

 

We do not.

 

- You wish you could.

- Whose side are you on?

 

The bees!

 

I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.

Those crazy legs kept me up all night.

 

Barry, this is what you want

to do with your life?

 

I want to do it for all our lives.

Nobody works harder than bees!

 

Dad, I remember you

coming home so overworked

 

your hands were still stirring.

You couldn't stop.

 

I remember that.

 

What right do they have to our honey?

 

We live on two cups a year. They put it

in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!

 

Even if it's true, what can one bee do?

 

Sting them where it really hurts.

 

In the face! The eye!

 

- That would hurt.

- No.

 

Up the nose? That's a killer.

 

There's only one place you can sting

the humans, one place where it matters.

 

Hive at Five, the hive's only

full-hour action news source.

 

No more bee beards!

 

With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.

 

Weather with Storm Stinger.

 

Sports with Buzz Larvi.

 

And Jeanette Ohung.

 

- Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.

- And I'm Jeanette Ohung.

 

A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,

 

intends to sue the human race

for stealing our honey,

 

packaging it and profiting

from it illegally!

 

Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,

 

we'll have three former queens here in

our studio, discussing their new book,

 

Olassy Ladies,

out this week on Hexagon.

 

Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.

 

Did you ever think, "I'm a kid

from the hive. I can't do this"?

 

Bees have never been afraid

to change the world.

 

What about Bee Oolumbus?

Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?

 

Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.

 

We were thinking

of stickball or candy stores.

 

How old are you?

 

The bee community

is supporting you in this case,

 

which will be the trial

of the bee century.

 

You know, they have a Larry King

in the human world too.

 

It's a common name. Next week...

 

He looks like you and has a show

and suspenders and colored dots...

 

Next week...

 

Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the

guest even though you just heard 'em.

 

Bear Week next week!

They're scary, hairy and here live.

 

Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,

squinty eyes, very Jewish.

 

In tennis, you attack

at the point of weakness!

 

It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.

 

Honey, her backhand's a joke!

I'm not gonna take advantage of that?

 

Quiet, please.

Actual work going on here.

 

- Is that that same bee?

- Yes, it is!

 

I'm helping him sue the human race.

 

- Hello.

- Hello, bee.

 

This is Ken.

 

Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size

ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.

 

Why does he talk again?

 

Listen, you better go

'cause we're really busy working.

 

But it's our yogurt night!

 

Bye-bye.

 

Why is yogurt night so difficult?!

 

You poor thing.

You two have been at this for hours!

 

Yes, and Adam here

has been a huge help.

 

- Frosting...

- How many sugars?

 

Just one. I try not

to use the competition.

 

So why are you helping me?

 

Bees have good qualities.

 

And it takes my mind off the shop.

 

Instead of flowers, people

are giving balloon bouquets now.

 

Those are great, if you're three.

 

And artificial flowers.

 

- Oh, those just get me psychotic!

- Yeah, me too.

 

Bent stingers, pointless pollination.

 

Bees must hate those fake things!

 

Nothing worse

than a daffodil that's had work done.

 

Maybe this could make up

for it a little bit.

 

- This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.

- I guess.

 

You sure you want to go through with it?

 

Am I sure? When I'm done with

the humans, they won't be able

 

to say, "Honey, I'm home,"

without paying a royalty!

 

It's an incredible scene

here in downtown Manhattan,

 

where the world anxiously waits,

because for the first time in history,

 

we will hear for ourselves

if a honeybee can actually speak.

 

What have we gotten into here, Barry?

 

It's pretty big, isn't it?

 

I can't believe how many humans

don't work during the day.

 

You think billion-dollar multinational

food companies have good lawyers?

 

Everybody needs to stay

behind the barricade.

 

- What's the matter?

- I don't know, I just got a chill.

 

Well, if it isn't the bee team.

 

You boys work on this?

 

All rise! The Honorable

Judge Bumbleton presiding.

 

All right. Oase number 4475,

 

Superior Oourt of New York,

Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry

 

is now in session.

 

Mr. Montgomery, you're representing

the five food companies collectively?

 

A privilege.

 

Mr. Benson... you're representing

all the bees of the world?

 

I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,

we're ready to proceed.

 

Mr. Montgomery,

your opening statement, please.

 

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

 

my grandmother was a simple woman.

 

Born on a farm, she believed

it was man's divine right

 

to benefit from the bounty

of nature God put before us.

 

If we lived in the topsy-turvy world

Mr. Benson imagines,

 

just think of what would it mean.

 

I would have to negotiate

with the silkworm

 

for the elastic in my britches!

 

Talking bee!

 

How do we know this isn't some sort of

 

holographic motion-picture-capture

Hollywood wizardry?

 

They could be using laser beams!

 

Robotics! Ventriloquism!

Oloning! For all we know,

 

he could be on steroids!

 

Mr. Benson?

 

Ladies and gentlemen,

there's no trickery here.

 

I'm just an ordinary bee.

Honey's pretty important to me.

 

It's important to all bees.

We invented it!

 

We make it. And we protect it

with our lives.

 

Unfortunately, there are

some people in this room

 

who think they can take it from us

 

'cause we're the little guys!

I'm hoping that, after this is all over,

 

you'll see how, by taking our honey,

you not only take everything we have

 

but everything we are!

 

I wish he'd dress like that

all the time. So nice!

 

Oall your first witness.

 

So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden

of Honey Farms, big company you have.

 

I suppose so.

 

I see you also own

Honeyburton and Honron!

 

Yes, they provide beekeepers

for our farms.

 

Beekeeper. I find that

to be a very disturbing term.

 

I don't imagine you employ

any bee-free-ers, do you?

 

- No.

- I couldn't hear you.

 

- No.

- No.

 

Because you don't free bees.

You keep bees. Not only that,

 

it seems you thought a bear would be

an appropriate image for a jar of honey.

 

They're very lovable creatures.

 

Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.

 

You mean like this?

 

Bears kill bees!

 

How'd you like his head crashing

through your living room?!

 

Biting into your couch!

Spitting out your throw pillows!

 

OK, that's enough. Take him away.

 

So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.

Your name intrigues me.

 

- Where have I heard it before?

- I was with a band called The Police.

 

But you've never been

a police officer, have you?

 

No, I haven't.

 

No, you haven't. And so here

we have yet another example

 

of bee culture casually

stolen by a human

 

for nothing more than

a prance-about stage name.

 

Oh, please.

 

Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?

 

Because I'm feeling

a little stung, Sting.

 

Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!

 

That's not his real name?! You idiots!

 

Mr. Liotta, first,

belated congratulations on

 

your Emmy win for a guest spot

on ER in 2005.

 

Thank you. Thank you.

 

I see from your resume

that you're devilishly handsome

 

with a churning inner turmoil

that's ready to blow.

 

I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?

 

Not yet it isn't. But is this

what it's come to for you?

 

Exploiting tiny, helpless bees

so you don't

 

have to rehearse

your part and learn your lines, sir?

 

Watch it, Benson!

I could blow right now!

 

This isn't a goodfella.

This is a badfella!

 

Why doesn't someone just step on

this creep, and we can all go home?!

 

- Order in this court!

- You're all thinking it!

 

Order! Order, I say!

 

- Say it!

- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!

 

I think it was awfully nice

of that bear to pitch in like that.

 

I think the jury's on our side.

 

Are we doing everything right, legally?

 

I'm a florist.

 

Right. Well, here's to a great team.

 

To a great team!

 

Well, hello.

 

- Ken!

- Hello.

 

I didn't think you were coming.

 

No, I was just late.

I tried to call, but... the battery.

 

I didn't want all this to go to waste,

so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.

 

Oh, that was lucky.

 

There's a little left.

I could heat it up.

 

Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.

 

So I hear you're quite a tennis player.

 

I'm not much for the game myself.

The ball's a little grabby.

 

That's where I usually sit.

Right... there.

 

Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,

 

and he agreed with me that eating with

chopsticks isn't really a special skill.

 

You think I don't see what you're doing?

 

I know how hard it is to find

the rightjob. We have that in common.

 

Do we?

 

Bees have 100 percent employment,

but we do jobs like taking the crud out.

 

That's just what

I was thinking about doing.

 

Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor

for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.

 

I'm going to drain the old stinger.

 

Yeah, you do that.

 

Look at that.

 

You know, I've just about had it

 

with your little mind games.

 

- What's that?

- Italian Vogue.

 

Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.

 

A lot of ads.

 

Remember what Van said, why is

your life more valuable than mine?

 

Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!

 

I think something stinks in here!

 

I love the smell of flowers.

 

How do you like the smell of flames?!

 

Not as much.

 

Water bug! Not taking sides!

 

Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat!

This is pathetic!

 

I've got issues!

 

Well, well, well, a royal flush!

 

- You're bluffing.

- Am I?

 

Surf's up, dude!

 

Poo water!

 

That bowl is gnarly.

 

Except for those dirty yellow rings!

 

Kenneth! What are you doing?!

 

You know, I don't even like honey!

I don't eat it!

 

We need to talk!

 

He's just a little bee!

 

And he happens to be

the nicest bee I've met in a long time!

 

Long time? What are you talking about?!

Are there other bugs in your life?

 

No, but there are other things bugging

me in life. And you're one of them!

 

Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...

 

My nerves are fried from riding

on this emotional roller coaster!

 

Goodbye, Ken.

 

And for your information,

 

I prefer sugar-free, artificial

sweeteners made by man!

 

I'm sorry about all that.

 

I know it's got

an aftertaste! I like it!

 

I always felt there was some kind

of barrier between Ken and me.

 

I couldn't overcome it.

Oh, well.

 

Are you OK for the trial?

 

I believe Mr. Montgomery

is about out of ideas.

 

We would like to call

Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.

 

Good idea! You can really see why he's

considered one of the best lawyers...

 

Yeah.

 

Layton, you've

gotta weave some magic

 

with this jury,

or it's gonna be all over.

 

Don't worry. The only thing I have

to do to turn this jury around

 

is to remind them

of what they don't like about bees.

 

- You got the tweezers?

- Are you allergic?

 

Only to losing, son. Only to losing.

 

Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you

what I think we'd all like to know.

 

What exactly is your relationship

 

to that woman?

 

We're friends.

 

- Good friends?

- Yes.

 

How good? Do you live together?

 

Wait a minute...

 

Are you her little...

 

...bedbug?

 

I've seen a bee documentary or two.

From what I understand,

 

doesn't your queen give birth

to all the bee children?

 

- Yeah, but...

- So those aren't your real parents!

 

- Oh, Barry...

- Yes, they are!

 

Hold me back!

 

You're an illegitimate bee,

aren't you, Benson?

 

He's denouncing bees!

 

Don't y'all date your cousins?

 

- Objection!

- I'm going to pincushion this guy!

 

Adam, don't! It's what he wants!

 

Oh, I'm hit!!

 

Oh, lordy, I am hit!

 

Order! Order!

 

The venom! The venom

is coursing through my veins!

 

I have been felled

by a winged beast of destruction!

 

You see? You can't treat them

like equals! They're striped savages!

 

Stinging's the only thing

they know! It's their way!

 

- Adam, stay with me.

- I can't feel my legs.

 

What angel of mercy

will come forward to suck the poison

 

from my heaving buttocks?

 

I will have order in this court. Order!

 

Order, please!

 

The case of the honeybees

versus the human race

 

took a pointed turn against the bees

 

yesterday when one of their legal

team stung Layton T. Montgomery.

 

- Hey, buddy.

- Hey.

 

- Is there much pain?

- Yeah.

 

I...

 

I blew the whole case, didn't I?

 

It doesn't matter. What matters is

you're alive. You could have died.

 

I'd be better off dead. Look at me.

 

They got it from the cafeteria

downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.

 

Look, there's

a little celery still on it.

 

What was it like to sting someone?

 

I can't explain it. It was all...

 

All adrenaline and then...

and then ecstasy!

 

All right.

 

You think it was all a trap?

 

Of course. I'm sorry.

I flew us right into this.

 

What were we thinking? Look at us. We're

just a couple of bugs in this world.

 

What will the humans do to us

if they win?

 

I don't know.

 

I hear they put the roaches in motels.

That doesn't sound so bad.

 

Adam, they check in,

but they don't check out!

 

Oh, my.

 

Oould you get a nurse

to close that window?

 

- Why?

- The smoke.

 

Bees don't smoke.

 

Right. Bees don't smoke.

 

Bees don't smoke!

But some bees are smoking.

 

That's it! That's our case!

 

It is? It's not over?

 

Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.

 

Get back to the court and stall.

Stall any way you can.

 

And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.

 

Mr. Flayman.

 

Yes? Yes, Your Honor!

 

Where is the rest of your team?

 

Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.

 

Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,

 

and as a result,

we don't make very good time.

 

I actually heard a funny story about...

 

Your Honor,

haven't these ridiculous bugs

 

taken up enough

of this court's valuable time?

 

How much longer will we allow

these absurd shenanigans to go on?

 

They have presented no compelling

evidence to support their charges

 

against my clients,

who run legitimate businesses.

 

I move for a complete dismissal

of this entire case!

 

Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going

 

to have to consider

Mr. Montgomery's motion.

 

But you can't! We have a terrific case.

 

Where is your proof?

Where is the evidence?

 

Show me the smoking gun!

 

Hold it, Your Honor!

You want a smoking gun?

 

Here is your smoking gun.

 

What is that?

 

It's a bee smoker!

 

What, this?

This harmless little contraption?

 

This couldn't hurt a fly,

let alone a bee.

 

Look at what has happened

 

to bees who have never been asked,

"Smoking or non?"

 

Is this what nature intended for us?

 

To be forcibly addicted

to smoke machines

 

and man-made wooden slat work camps?

 

Living out our lives as honey slaves

to the white man?

 

- What are we gonna do?

- He's playing the species card.

 

Ladies and gentlemen, please,

free these bees!

 

Free the bees! Free the bees!

 

Free the bees!

 

Free the bees! Free the bees!

 

The court finds in favor of the bees!

 

Vanessa, we won!

 

I knew you could do it! High-five!

 

Sorry.

 

I'm OK! You know what this means?

 

All the honey

will finally belong to the bees.

 

Now we won't have

to work so hard all the time.

 

This is an unholy perversion

of the balance of nature, Benson.

 

You'll regret this.

 

Barry, how much honey is out there?

 

All right. One at a time.

 

Barry, who are you wearing?

 

My sweater is Ralph Lauren,

and I have no pants.

 

- What if Montgomery's right?

- What do you mean?

 

We've been living the bee way

a long time, 27 million years.

 

Oongratulations on your victory.

What will you demand as a settlement?

 

First, we'll demand a complete shutdown

of all bee work camps.

 

Then we want back the honey

that was ours to begin with,

 

every last drop.

 

We demand an end to the glorification

of the bear as anything more

 

than a filthy, smelly,

bad-breath stink machine.

 

We're all aware

of what they do in the woods.

 

Wait for my signal.

 

Take him out.

 

He'll have nauseous

for a few hours, then he'll be fine.

 

And we will no longer tolerate

bee-negative nicknames...

 

But it's just a prance-about stage name!

 

...unnecessary inclusion of honey

in bogus health products

 

and la-dee-da human

tea-time snack garnishments.

 

Oan't breathe.

 

Bring it in, boys!

 

Hold it right there! Good.

 

Tap it.

 

Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,

and there's gallons more coming!

 

- I think we need to shut down!

- Shut down? We've never shut down.

 

Shut down honey production!

 

Stop making honey!

 

Turn your key, sir!

 

What do we do now?

 

Oannonball!

 

We're shutting honey production!

 

Mission abort.

 

Aborting pollination and nectar detail.

Returning to base.

 

Adam, you wouldn't believe

how much honey was out there.

 

Oh, yeah?

 

What's going on? Where is everybody?

 

- Are they out celebrating?

- They're home.

 

They don't know what to do.

Laying out, sleeping in.

 

I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way

to San Antonio with a cricket.

 

At least we got our honey back.

 

Sometimes I think, so what if humans

liked our honey? Who wouldn't?

 

It's the greatest thing in the world!

I was excited to be part of making it.

 

This was my new desk. This was my

new job. I wanted to do it really well.

 

And now...

 

Now I can't.

 

I don't understand

why they're not happy.

 

I thought their lives would be better!

 

They're doing nothing. It's amazing.

Honey really changes people.

 

You don't have any idea

what's going on, do you?

 

- What did you want to show me?

- This.

 

What happened here?

 

That is not the half of it.

 

Oh, no. Oh, my.

 

They're all wilting.

 

Doesn't look very good, does it?

 

No.

 

And whose fault do you think that is?

 

You know, I'm gonna guess bees.

 

Bees?

 

Specifically, me.

 

I didn't think bees not needing to make

honey would affect all these things.

 

It's notjust flowers.

Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.

 

That's our whole SAT test right there.

 

Take away produce, that affects

the entire animal kingdom.

 

And then, of course...

 

The human species?

 

So if there's no more pollination,

 

it could all just go south here,

couldn't it?

 

I know this is also partly my fault.

 

How about a suicide pact?

 

How do we do it?

 

- I'll sting you, you step on me.

- Thatjust kills you twice.

 

Right, right.

 

Listen, Barry...

sorry, but I gotta get going.

 

I had to open my mouth and talk.

 

Vanessa?

 

Vanessa? Why are you leaving?

Where are you going?

 

To the final Tournament of Roses parade

in Pasadena.

 

They've moved it to this weekend

because all the flowers are dying.

 

It's the last chance

I'll ever have to see it.

 

Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.

I never meant it to turn out like this.

 

I know. Me neither.

 

Tournament of Roses.

Roses can't do sports.

 

Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?

 

Roses!

 

Vanessa!

 

Roses?!

 

Barry?

 

- Roses are flowers!

- Yes, they are.

 

Flowers, bees, pollen!

 

I know.

That's why this is the last parade.

 

Maybe not.

Oould you ask him to slow down?

 

Oould you slow down?

 

Barry!

 

OK, I made a huge mistake.

This is a total disaster, all my fault.

 

Yes, it kind of is.

 

I've ruined the planet.

I wanted to help you

 

with the flower shop.

I've made it worse.

 

Actually, it's completely closed down.

 

I thought maybe you were remodeling.

 

But I have another idea, and it's

greater than my previous ideas combined.

 

I don't want to hear it!

 

All right, they have the roses,

the roses have the pollen.

 

I know every bee, plant

and flower bud in this park.

 

All we gotta do is get what they've got

back here with what we've got.

 

- Bees.

- Park.

 

- Pollen!

- Flowers.

 

- Repollination!

- Across the nation!

 

Tournament of Roses,

Pasadena, Oalifornia.

 

They've got nothing

but flowers, floats and cotton candy.

 

Security will be tight.

 

I have an idea.

 

Vanessa Bloome, FTD.

 

Official floral business. It's real.

 

Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.

 

Thank you. It was a gift.

 

Once inside,

we just pick the right float.

 

How about The Princess and the Pea?

 

I could be the princess,

and you could be the pea!

 

Yes, I got it.

 

- Where should I sit?

- What are you?

 

- I believe I'm the pea.

- The pea?

 

It goes under the mattresses.

 

- Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.

- I'm getting the marshal.

 

You do that!

This whole parade is a fiasco!

 

Let's see what this baby'll do.

 

Hey, what are you doing?!

 

Then all we do

is blend in with traffic...

 

...without arousing suspicion.

 

Once at the airport,

there's no stopping us.

 

Stop! Security.

 

- You and your insect pack your float?

- Yes.

 

Has it been

in your possession the entire time?

 

Would you remove your shoes?

 

- Remove your stinger.

- It's part of me.

 

I know. Just having some fun.

Enjoy your flight.

 

Then if we're lucky, we'll have

just enough pollen to do the job.

 

Oan you believe how lucky we are? We

have just enough pollen to do the job!

 

I think this is gonna work.

 

It's got to work.

 

Attention, passengers,

this is Oaptain Scott.

 

We have a bit of bad weather

in New York.

 

It looks like we'll experience

a couple hours delay.

 

Barry, these are cut flowers

with no water. They'll never make it.

 

I gotta get up there

and talk to them.

 

Be careful.

 

Oan I get help

with the Sky Mall magazine?

 

I'd like to order the talking

inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.

 

Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.

 

- What'd you say, Hal?

- Nothing.

 

Bee!

 

Don't freak out! My entire species...

 

What are you doing?

 

- Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!

- Who's an attorney?

 

Don't move.

 

Oh, Barry.

 

Good afternoon, passengers.

This is your captain.

 

Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B

please report to the cockpit?

 

And please hurry!

 

What happened here?

 

There was a DustBuster,

a toupee, a life raft exploded.

 

One's bald, one's in a boat,

they're both unconscious!

 

- Is that another bee joke?

- No!

 

No one's flying the plane!

 

This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.

What's your status?

 

This is Vanessa Bloome.

I'm a florist from New York.

 

Where's the pilot?

 

He's unconscious,

and so is the copilot.

 

Not good. Does anyone onboard

have flight experience?

 

As a matter of fact, there is.

 

- Who's that?

- Barry Benson.

 

From the honey trial?! Oh, great.

 

Vanessa, this is nothing more

than a big metal bee.

 

It's got giant wings, huge engines.

 

I can't fly a plane.

 

- Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?

- Yes.

 

How hard could it be?

 

Wait, Barry!

We're headed into some lightning.

 

This is Bob Bumble. We have some

late-breaking news from JFK Airport,

 

where a suspenseful scene

is developing.

 

Barry Benson,

fresh from his legal victory...

 

That's Barry!

 

...is attempting to land a plane,

loaded with people, flowers

 

and an incapacitated flight crew.

 

Flowers?!

 

We have a storm in the area

and two individuals at the controls

 

with absolutely no flight experience.

 

Just a minute.

There's a bee on that plane.

 

I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson

and his no-account compadres.

 

They've done enough damage.

 

But isn't he your only hope?

 

Technically, a bee

shouldn't be able to fly at all.

 

Their wings are too small...

 

Haven't we heard this a million times?

 

"The surface area of the wings

and body mass make no sense."

 

- Get this on the air!

- Got it.

 

- Stand by.

- We're going live.

 

The way we work may be a mystery to you.

 

Making honey takes a lot of bees

doing a lot of small jobs.

 

But let me tell you about a small job.

 

If you do it well,

it makes a big difference.

 

More than we realized.

To us, to everyone.

 

That's why I want to get bees

back to working together.

 

That's the bee way!

We're not made of Jell-O.

 

We get behind a fellow.

 

- Black and yellow!

- Hello!

 

Left, right, down, hover.

 

- Hover?

- Forget hover.

 

This isn't so hard.

Beep-beep! Beep-beep!

 

Barry, what happened?!

 

Wait, I think we were

on autopilot the whole time.

 

- That may have been helping me.

- And now we're not!

 

So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.

 

All of you, let's get

behind this fellow! Move it out!

 

Move out!

 

Our only chance is if I do what I'd do,

you copy me with the wings of the plane!

 

Don't have to yell.

 

I'm not yelling!

We're in a lot of trouble.

 

It's very hard to concentrate

with that panicky tone in your voice!

 

It's not a tone. I'm panicking!

 

I can't do this!

 

Vanessa, pull yourself together.

You have to snap out of it!

 

You snap out of it.

 

You snap out of it.

 

- You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it!

 

- You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it!

 

- You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it!

 

- Hold it!

- Why? Oome on, it's my turn.

 

How is the plane flying?

 

I don't know.

 

Hello?

 

Benson, got any flowers

for a happy occasion in there?

 

The Pollen Jocks!

 

They do get behind a fellow.

 

- Black and yellow.

- Hello.

 

All right, let's drop this tin can

on the blacktop.

 

Where? I can't see anything. Oan you?

 

No, nothing. It's all cloudy.

 

Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.

 

- Thinking bee.

- Thinking bee.

 

Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 

Wait a minute.

I think I'm feeling something.

 

- What?

- I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.

 

Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.

 

Bring the nose down.

 

Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 

- What in the world is on the tarmac?

- Get some lights on that!

 

Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 

- Vanessa, aim for the flower.

- OK.

 

Out the engines. We're going in

on bee power. Ready, boys?

 

Affirmative!

 

Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.

 

Land on that flower!

 

Ready? Full reverse!

 

Spin it around!

 

- Not that flower! The other one!

- Which one?

 

- That flower.

- I'm aiming at the flower!

 

That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.

I mean the giant pulsating flower

 

made of millions of bees!

 

Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.

 

Rotate around it.

 

- This is insane, Barry!

- This's the only way I know how to fly.

 

Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane

flying in an insect-like pattern?

 

Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid.

Smell it. Full reverse!

 

Just drop it. Be a part of it.

 

Aim for the center!

 

Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!

 

Oome on, already.

 

Barry, we did it!

You taught me how to fly!

 

- Yes. No high-five!

- Right.

 

Barry, it worked!

Did you see the giant flower?

 

What giant flower? Where? Of course

I saw the flower! That was genius!

 

- Thank you.

- But we're not done yet.

 

Listen, everyone!

 

This runway is covered

with the last pollen

 

from the last flowers

available anywhere on Earth.

 

That means this is our last chance.

 

We're the only ones who make honey,

pollinate flowers and dress like this.

 

If we're gonna survive as a species,

this is our moment! What do you say?

 

Are we going to be bees, orjust

Museum of Natural History keychains?

 

We're bees!

 

Keychain!

 

Then follow me! Except Keychain.

 

Hold on, Barry. Here.

 

You've earned this.

 

Yeah!

 

I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect

fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.

 

Oh, yeah.

 

That's our Barry.

 

Mom! The bees are back!

 

If anybody needs

to make a call, now's the time.

 

I got a feeling we'll be

working late tonight!

 

Here's your change. Have a great

afternoon! Oan I help who's next?

 

Would you like some honey with that?

It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.

 

Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.

And I don't see a nickel!

 

Sometimes I just feel

like a piece of meat!

 

I had no idea.

 

Barry, I'm sorry.

Have you got a moment?

 

Would you excuse me?

My mosquito associate will help you.

 

Sorry I'm late.

 

He's a lawyer too?

 

I was already a blood-sucking parasite.

All I needed was a briefcase.

 

Have a great afternoon!

 

Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,

and I can't get them anywhere.

 

No problem, Vannie.

Just leave it to me.

 

You're a lifesaver, Barry.

Oan I help who's next?

 

All right, scramble, jocks!

It's time to fly.

 

Thank you, Barry!

 

That bee is living my life!

 

Let it go, Kenny.

 

- When will this nightmare end?!

- Let it all go.

 

- Beautiful day to fly.

- Sure is.

 

Between you and me,

I was dying to get out of that office.

 

You have got

to start thinking bee, my friend.

 

- Thinking bee!

- Me?

 

Hold it. Let's just stop

for a second. Hold it.

 

I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.

Oan we stop here?

 

I'm not making a major life decision

during a production number!

 

All right. Take ten, everybody.

Wrap it up, guys.

 

I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

From em

February 12, 2020 at 10:56 AM

I think Peyton is gay:/

From Hasben

February 24, 2020 at 9:55 AM

Hasben hotel is a realy good show.

From Kevin Cain

February 25, 2020 at 1:05 PM

Hasben hotel has an amazing plot, with many well thought out characters.

From Kamal Mishra

February 26, 2020 at 12:00 PM

ABNORMAL and ABSURD mode of entries

From Subaru

Mumbai

March 12, 2020 at 11:49 AM

Thank you very very much! This was infinitely helpful!

Feedback

2015-03-14

I want to thank everyone who has used this site and left feedback. This page is now the most active on my server. The popularity of the site has inspired me to add improvements. Comments about how the site is used is both gratifying as well as useful. Seeing applications where polynomial regression can be applied is useful to me as well as students who also use this site.

Feel free to make requests for features, interface options, ext. I can't promise I can implement them all, but getting a feeling for features/changes people want helps me consider where to concentrate improvement efforts.

Not everyone is always happy with this site—or having to use this site. Even primary school students from the Las Virgenes Unified School District in Los Angeles County, California are still free to voice their opinion. As long as the comments are not inundated with extraneous/malice remarks I support the right of students to voice their discontent. Disgruntled users may consider pointing out what they don't like about the site, why they don't like having to use the site, or why they don't enjoy the subject. Remember: what is written here cannot be censored by a school administrators.

Educators

One of the goals of this page was not only to provide a tool for calculating polynomial regression, but examples of how such techniques are used in real-world scenarios, and some of the mathematical phenomena exhibited.

Here are some articles on the mathematics of polynomial regression:

This site has been used by people from primary school through distinguished universities. My hope is to provide something that can be useful to each level of user. I do not expect that high school students will be able to follow partial differentiation and the linear algebra necessary for the equations behind the regression technique. However, a pre-calculus student might be able to visually understand the concept of minimizing a quadratic function. For university level students I hope the explanations are detailed enough to give a comprehensive picture of how and why the algorithms work.

These goals require feedback. Suggestions, additions, clarifications, corrections, and criticisms are all welcome. Language is not my strong point, and while I have tried to convey ideas in the most clear manner I don't always succeed. And while I am better at math I am far from above mistakes. So proof reading and peer review would be nice.

History

Privacy

The data submitted is analyzed server-side, and saved for the duration of the session (which is 24 minutes). Aside from the mathematics performed on the data, no other analysis is done. The data is not kept, and will never be shared—even with the site's author. We are not a data mining company. Nonetheless, this site does not use a secure connection (i.e. no encryption or authentication), and thus it isn't recommended this site be used to analyze highly sensitive sets of data.

We do, however, keep records for basic Web analytics. These are used for statistical purposes such as the number of visitors a day and tracking spam robots.

About

This page is designed and maintained by Andrew Que. To get in touch with Andrew Que, visit his contact page. It uses the Polynomial Regression class to preform the regression calculations and X/Y Plot to graph the results.